Play

Let’s Be honest:

Imposter Syndrome kicks my butt every time I try to expand to the next level. #mindset #perseverance #podcast Click To Tweet

It’s especially difficult since I felt like a failure for so many years from 2008 through 2011

You could say, I’m success shy.

  • Yesterday was a very big day in my business!
    • I landed a very big client, and
    • I’m starting something very big, and very new with Andrew Warner of Mixergy, no less. YIKES!
  • I should be beyond excited, right?
  • I awoke from a terrifying dream last night
    • a baby was thrashing around, tangled up in the covers of a bed
    • When I uncovered it, the look on the baby’s face was inhuman
      • furrowed brow
      • downturned mouth
      • sunken cheeks
      • tightly closed eyes, clearly experiencing a painful, fitful dream
    • I got the sense it was my child, but it wasn’t
      • it didn’t look anything like either of my boys as babies
      • and yet, I felt a closeness to it
  • When I awoke, breathing heavily, a feeling of fear gripping my chest
    • I took a deep breath to calm down
    • I started analyzing the dream
    • I’m sure you’ve already guessed some of my analysis?
      • The baby was me
      • I’m feeling a bit overwhelmed and helpless
      • I’m feeling more than a bit scared that I can’t deliver
      • I’m feeling like I’m in over my head, and who am I to think I can deliver?
  • So, whether or not you think I’m a success, doesn’t really matter.
  • Everyone, when taking the next big leap, feels fear and uncertainty. #mindset #perseverance #success Click To Tweet
    • they’re going into unknown territory
    • they’re doing new things that make them a bit unsure
    • they feel they’ll be judged
  • A few years ago, say 2012, I would have stayed in that scared place the rest of the night.
    • I would have let the negative scary loop of emotions and conversation continue for hours in my mind, unable to find peace or to sleep
    • The next morning, and all throughout the day, I would have been almost useless, creating a self-fulfilling prophecy of doubt becoming reality, because I wouldn’t have gotten anything done.
  • Now, I was able to identify the fear – “I’m an imposter”
  • I was able to take an honest look at myself
    • Is what I’m being hired to do outside my capabilities and knowledge?
    • Have I created success for people before similar to the success my latest client has hired to help her achieve?
    • Do I have the skills and knowledge for this amazing new project Andrew has laid out before me?
    • Has my 14 years of online business experience, with all it’s successes and failures prepared me with everything I need to succeed right now?
  • The answer to each and every question was a resounding, “YES!”
  • So, I took another deep breath, and fell back into a peaceful sleep.
  • Have you felt like this?
  • Have you been overwhelmed with these feelings and emotions to the extent that you were helpless, paralyzed, and thereby fulfilling the doubts growing in your own mind?
  • Here's one thing you can do to give you ammunition for the next time you' feel like an imposter. #podcast Click To Tweet
    • I wrote an email to 5 people I trust (close friends and members of my mastermind) to give me honest feedback when asked (I wish I could take credit for this exercise, but I can’t. I also can’t remember to whom I owe the credit – probably Pat Flynn, Michael Hyatt or Jaime Masters:
      • Subject:  Seriously, I’m at a crossroads, and I need your help
      • Message:
        • If I could ask you to think of me for just a few seconds.Close your eyes, and picture my face in your mind.I would like your answer to three questions, honestly, this is me, not an
          automated/networking/B.S. email…it’s me typing and asking.What do you see as my top strengths?What three words would you use to describe me?What do you see as my weaknesses?

          I can do so many things.

          I can adapt to so many situations.

          I’m focusing my voice, and I am so thankful I have just a few people I can
          trust to be kind, yet direct, constructive and helpful to my current
          journey.

          Thank you for being one of those people.

          MKJ

    • All 5 people wrote back, because I chose them well, and their answers to the questions were almost exactly the same!
      • You can substitute whatever you think are my strengths for that part.
      • You can also think of your own three words to describe me.
      • All of them said this was my weakness:
        • You don’t always believe in yourself — you hold back from really going for it 
          You don’t always see your gifts!
    • Every time I hit smack-dab into the brick wall I create for myself, I remember these responses, and break through.
  • Your assignment: send that email to at least 5 people you trust.
    • 20 pieces of motivational content for being you (3 words, and 1 strength from each person)
    • Only 5 things you need to work on
  • That’ll make anyone’s day!

Enjoy the Journey!